Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize