Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
