Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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