ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize