My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
