Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
