Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
