Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
The air taste purple.
Randomize
