Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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