I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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