shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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