you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize