Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Randomize
