found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
