he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
