have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
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