hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
