I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize