Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
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So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
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Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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