drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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