Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
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She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
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I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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