I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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