I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
