Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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