Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Randomize