hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
