I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
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