I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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