His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
