She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
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