Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
