She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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