he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize