this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
