YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
