Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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