im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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