I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
