yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.