if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
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