we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
