even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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