Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize