I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
