just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
