He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
