Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
