Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
