"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Tell her she can't have a vagina
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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