hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Randomize
