That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize